


Push me Away then Beg me to Stay

by DetectiveOfTheEast, MagicKaitō1412 (naosuki)



Series: Impetuous Souls [17]
Category: Magic Kaito, 名探偵コナン | Detective Conan | Case Closed
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arguing, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Making Up, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:34:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23706214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DetectiveOfTheEast/pseuds/DetectiveOfTheEast, https://archiveofourown.org/users/naosuki/pseuds/MagicKait%C5%8D1412
Summary: In all honesty, Saguru doesn't know what he's doing here.He hasn't slept properly in days. After the first panic attack, many more did follow. Saguru was quite capable of pretending to be happy and fine in front of his household, enjoying the holiday with them as best as he could manage, however. The worst part is that immediately upon entering the bar, he spots Hattori.And Heiji is currently preoccupied with another man who must have just arrived as well, judging by the charming smile he gives him and the fact that he just ordered his own drink.The very same beer Hattori is drinking.He's not very subtle, is he?
Relationships: Hakuba Saguru/Hattori Heiji
Series: Impetuous Souls [17]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1517900
Comments: 11
Kudos: 34





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [DetectiveOfTheEast](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DetectiveOfTheEast/gifts).



> It has recently come to our attention that someone had been quite inspired by our work.  
> As such, it would be very appreciated if people credited us if we inspired them. ┬┴┬┴┤ʘ‿ʘ)├┬┴┬┴
> 
> Or at the very least gave us kudos for our own work. Because using the very same title for a fanfiction as we did is not very subtle.  
> Especially not if the same fanfiction uses a few words and phrasings we have previously used as well.  
> And that title hasn't really been used for many fanfictions, either.
> 
> We do not mind inspiring others one bit, but credit where credit is due, please.

In all honesty, Saguru doesn't know what he's doing here.

He hasn't slept properly in days. After the first panic attack, many more did follow. And Christmas had been a nightmare. Of course not an obvious one, as Saguru was quite capable of pretending to be happy and fine in front of his household, enjoying the holiday with them as best as he could manage.

But once he was alone in his room again, he felt lonelier than ever, breaking down quite easily.

He wanted to give up, wanted to calm down, but instead of getting better, it all got a lot worse. The more he wanted to forget, the more he ended up remembering. Saguru even started a new notebook, rewriting his entries about Hattori Heiji in a more eloquent manner, more honestly, less judgingly.

To make matters worse, however, there was something telling him to return to the Ellery Queen's Bar. The bar in which the Osakan had apparently argued with Harada for his sake. The bar in which something seems to have happened between the two of them.

But no matter how much Saguru tries to remember, there's always an invisible wall keeping him from recalling the missing pieces, and he ends up with a mind-numbing headache. Still, he is here now. Once again.  _ Brilliant _ .

The worst part isn't even that he cannot for the life of him remember what has happened - something tells him Koizumi-san was involved in it, but surely that's not right - but rather that immediately upon entering the bar, he spots Hattori.

Not even a ‘he glanced around for a free spot and happened to see him’, no, a full on ‘his eyes immediately latched on to the Osakan and couldn't look away anymore’.

Saguru cannot talk to him, however. He doesn't have the right to.

Not to mention that Heiji is currently preoccupied with another man who must have just arrived as well, judging by the charming smile he gives him and the fact that he just ordered his own drink.

The very same beer Hattori is drinking.

He's not very subtle, is he?

\-------------------------------------------

Heiji's head hits the counter after what must have been about three sips of his Sapporo beer. He isn't experiencing any signs of alcohol intolerance, however. The Kendo swordsman had spent the last five days in his flat - depressed and alone - and ultimately had run out of things to do while feeling utterly heartbroken.

And now, he finds himself back at the bar. What a fucking déjà-vu this was. He feels like a total wreck yet again.

When he hears a voice that is foreign to him, Hattori abruptly perks his head up: A young man comes into view, maybe a little older than himself, who is now giving him the most charming smile. Then, he orders the same drink Heiji had called for previously.

At any rate, Heiji is not impressed.

“Hey, haven't I seen you here before?”

Quirking an eyebrow playfully, Heiji takes another sip directly out of the can.

“If ya think so, ya must have. I'm pretty conspicuous, aren't I?”

A chuckle, then his order arrives. The well-groomed stranger pours himself a glass and sips on it, his eyes never quite leaving the Osaka detective.

Involuntarily, Heiji takes a considerable whiff of the man's perfume, and while it doesn't exactly smell horrible, he would rather just sit there in peace, specifically, without having someone infiltrate his personal space.

“You know, you looked quite depressed a few moments ago. I know because I've observed you. Well, not in a creepy sense, just in a ‘that guy really catches my eye’ kinda way. Where are you from?'”

_ Great _ . That's just what Hattori needed tonight, a stranger chatting him up, possibly with the self-centered intention to get something from him.

“Osaka. What gave it away?”

“Did I just spot a hint of sarcasm? Well, in all honesty, it's your dialect. If I may say so, that only adds to your external charms.”

Heiji isn't tipsy enough to overlook this obvious attempt at flirting, since it's too ‘on the nose’ - even for someone of Hattori's calibre. To be fair, the stranger doesn't do a particularly bad job, meaning that he indeed sounded genuinely friendly.

With the exception of a certain blond detective, he doesn't remember any man ever making advances to him, deliberately flirting like this. The boy from Kansai doesn't want the attention, though he must admit that having someone throwing compliments at him is making him feel a little less lonely than before, if only temporarily.

In any case, he is still very much aware that it doesn't bode well to have a stranger talk him up like this. As far as Heiji's experience goes, sweet-talking stranger isn't exactly synonymous with trustworthiness.

“The name's Hikage Yoshihito.”

Taking another sip, he simply accepts his fate, deciding to go with the flow for now. What did he have to lose, after all?

\-------------------------------------------

Not for a single moment does Saguru take his eyes off of Heiji, slowly sitting down a little further away and keeping an eye on the scene. The other man is laughing now, eyes trained on the detective Hakuba developed feelings for, and the Londoner can't help but strain to hear what they're talking about.

To his dismay, however, he can merely make out something about observing Heiji, which must mean the man truly  _ is _ interested in him.

And the Detective of the West isn't pushing him away, either. He just lets the stranger, the unknown  _ man _ , keep on flirting, doesn't seem to care. Which is just so much worse than simply seeing him seek solace in the bottom of a bottle.

This indubitably is Saguru's fault.

\-------------------------------------------

“Nice ta meet ya. I'm Heiji.” The detective can clearly feel the young man's eyes on him while he looks anywhere else, avoiding direct eye contact. For some reason, he doesn't like being checked out by other people.

“Like,  _ that _ Hattori Heiji guy from Osaka? No way! It must be my lucky evening, then.” The stranger shouts with glee, practically beaming at Heiji.

“It really is you, after all. This is as good as it gets. I didn't trust my eyes back there, but that's mostly because I'm a little tipsy right now. I've heard quite a lot about your sharp deductive reasoning and skills as a detective - you're on the news quite often. That's probably what you're going for, right? Being a successful detective that's in charge of his own detective agency one day?”

“My old man would surely prefer if I were ta pursue the career of a simple police inspector. Not sure where I'll end up yet, frankly speaking. Either way, I can't keep myself from gettin’ involved in cases left and right, regardless of which path I'll choose in the end.”

This is the second time Hattori looks at the guy directly, immediately being greeted with another of Hikage's charming smiles. Does Yoshihito ever stop smiling? The good news is that they're past the point of aimless small talk, maybe he will enjoy himself after all.

“So, your father doesn't appear to be your biggest fan, huh? Sorry if it's too personal to say such a thing. I feel like he should support you regardless of what choice you make. But I'm sure someone like you will be fine.” Hikage chuckles again. “You seem like a person of many talents, Heiji-kun.”

“Ya really don't need ta flatter me. I-” Heiji hesitates. “I'm not  _ that _ big of a deal.”

He doesn't seem confident today, the usual arrogant tone he uses during a demonstration of his deductive reasoning nowhere to be seen.

“Doesn't seem like it to me. Although that's just the opinion of a friendly stranger at a bar and it's perfectly understandable that you'd be doubtful about my judgment.”

\-------------------------------------------

Out of nowhere, the drowsy looking guy begins to shout, suddenly seeming way more awake than he previously did. Evidently, he recognised Hattori, even going as far as to say that he's incredibly lucky for having met Heiji today.

Hakuba knows these types of conversations all too well: People buttering you up, telling you just how amazing they think you are, only to show their true hidden agenda later on. Mainly to have sex. To get money. Or even a favour. Sometimes all of those things.

Needless to say, he doesn't trust beanie boy one bit.

He doesn't hear what they're talking about after that, but before Saguru even knows what is happening, the stranger is smiling at Heiji again. Chuckles. Smiles. And smiles some more. 

He keeps calling the Osakan by his first name, too, which is just utterly disrespectful, given that the man  _ recognised _ him. At the very least he didn't drop the honorific yet, showing some restraint on that part.

All of this goes on for precisely 16 minutes and 47 seconds, with them gradually moving towards a conversation about a case Hattori solved in the past, when the stranger does something that causes Saguru's bile to come up a little.

\-------------------------------------------

“Wow, you really solved that case in under 2 hours? That's truly impressive!” Hikage laughs heartily, making full use of Heiji's current inobservance as he nonchalantly places a sneaky hand on the other's knee.

“You know, I would love to accompany you on a case some day. It sounds like a lot of excitement.”

Yoshihito's head rests on his hand, tilting his head to the right playfully as he looks at Heiji's eyes. They are glistening with the warm light a small lamp emanates above their heads, effectively rendering his saturated green irises visible in the otherwise dimmed ambience of the bar.

Both of them keep chit chatting back and forth for a little while longer, when the charming stranger suddenly orders another drink for his new acquaintance.

Only a keen eye would notice that Hikage's hand is actually sliding upwards, slowly but steadily, inch by inch. The Kansai detective doesn't seem to realise that Hikage is having less platonic things in mind, most certainly due to being accustomed to the Osakan way of neighborliness, which is also why he doesn't quite mind the proximity.

He didn't even notice Hikage getting closer with time, unaware of the implications the hand on his thigh might have.

And then, the impossible happens once again: Out of nowhere, the blond detective bursts in on their cheerful conversation. Heiji can only stand on the sidelines. Bewildered and speechless, the Osakan watches the situation unfold in front of his very own eyes. Saguru certainly gives them both quite a turn tonight.

\-------------------------------------------

The stranger places his hand on Heiji's knee, leans in close, and gives Hattori bedroom eyes. Saguru doesn't need to hear what the guy is saying, knows full well what someone like him would utter in this situation - he's heard it a million times before - and stands up from his seat, abandoning his untouched cocktail without a second thought.

The scene in front of him makes him feel absolutely sick, and he can't stop but thinking it's his fault all of this is happening in the first place. Which is exactly why he makes his way towards the two of them, stopping the hand that is dangerously close to Heiji's crotch now in its tracks.

With a tight grasp, Hakuba lifts the stranger's hand up, eyes narrowed as he speaks with the man in front of him.

From the corner of his eyes, Heiji can see Yoshihito's horrified expression, clearly as startled as the detective himself. The confidence prior to this event had completely gone down the drain and he doesn't say anything to defend himself.

“I am terribly sorry, but you seem to have misunderstood something, Nittobō-san. This guy here,” Saguru lets go of Yoshihito's hand, practically throws it aside with a force he himself didn't expect, and instead grabs Hattori's arm, “is not gay. So sorry. Now, if you'll excuse us, there is something I need to discuss with the highly esteemed Detective of the West.”

Hakuba pulls Heiji up from his seat, knocking over his drink in doing so - a fleeting feeling of déjà-vu overtaking Hattori’s mind - and yanks him to his side, shielding him from the bar-hopper's eyes.

“Oh, and Nittobō-san? I find it highly doubtful that you would be of any use to this detective during his work, so be a dear and don't get in his way, alright? You might want to look elsewhere for your enjoyment. I do hope you'll enjoy the rest of your evening, however.”

Saguru doesn't give Hikage the chance to respond, already dragging Heiji off somewhere and leaving him completely flabbergasted by the impulsive nature of his actions.

He didn't think this through.

Despite usually being so calculating and prepared, Hakuba didn't think this through, only acted in the heat of the moment, and has now reacted even quicker in order to decide where to go in the first place. Luckily, he finds the bathroom door quite easily, pushing Hattori inside and following him suite. Blessedly, it's currently unoccupied.

Once inside, however, all the confidence Saguru had just experienced seems to vanish in an instant. He makes the mistake of looking Heiji in his face, immediately letting go of his arm as if he'd been burnt, and looks away, unable to think of anything he could say to explain himself.

“‘Nittobō-san’, seriously? What in the world are ya doing?!” Heiji takes in a deep breath, trying to steel himself for the inevitable argument that is going to follow. 

Saguru flinches at the force of Heiji's words, mumbling a quiet apology before he even thinks about what he's doing. In all honesty, he feels a little like a scolded child right now, and he doesn't like that feeling one bit.

“I did not hear his name. . . so I had to make do somehow.” He admits.

Moments later, however, the other's words truly catch up with him, and he can no longer hold himself back. It's like a fuse had been lit and finally allowed to explode.

“Wait- what am I doing? What am  _ I _ doing!? You just let yourself be felt up by some stranger in a bar! Do you have any idea how dangerous that is!? And you just didn't care! That guy clearly had an ulterior motive and you just happily chatted with him! So I'm sorry I interfered on your little bar-date, but that was just reckless!”

The way the half-Brit phrased it must mean that he had been observing Heiji, without a doubt. Had he been listening this whole time!? When Saguru begins shouting, it echoes through the bathroom halls, making Heiji slightly shy away from his opponent for a moment.

Shortly after that, Hattori straightens his back and broadens his shoulders, which is a clear-cut sign of a deep-seated defense mechanism being at work.

The more Hakuba talks, the more he is leaning towards him, the angriness already flickering in the hot-blooded detective's eyes while he patiently listens to the other boy go on about matters he clearly didn't understand well enough.

The Osakan's patience, at a time and in a situation like this, was truly a miracle, especially in view of the fact that his heart felt like bursting into a thousand pieces. Above all, Heiji is confused: he doesn't understand why Hakuba is this upset with him tonight.

“Aho! Ya don't have any idea what y'are talkin’ about! And it wasn't a  _ bar-date _ ! Do ya really think that I jus' trusted that guy, no strings attached!? Yeah, he was kinda flirty at first, but we had a perfectly fine conversation afterwards. Either way, ya really don't know if he had some other hidden motive. Most folks come here ta enjoy themselves and meet new people. A-And he certainly didn't feel me up!”

While obviously being in denial about the groping part, underneath his fury, there is a vast amount of insecurity and doubt. He furrows his brows and looks at the ground for a brief moment. Maybe Heiji hadn't been careful this time.

“Do you really think I have no idea what I'm talking about?! Really?! Of course I do! I  _ slept _ with people like him! Not just once, not just twice, I slept with them over and over again! They're all nice and friendly, try to boost your ego and make you feel good. Then, before you know it, they get you to talk about something you're interested in, making you engage with them, and they sound  _ really _ interested. It's all just to get you into a false sense of security, Hattori-kun. The fact that he slid his hand upwards just proves my point.”

The more Saguru speaks, the quieter his voice gets, until it takes on a sad and hurt undertone. He knows perfectly well what he's talking about, after all. Anything to get himself from being alone.

Even after he realised that people weren't being genuine with him, Hakuba decided to let them get what they wanted, as long as he could talk to someone, could feel less alone. Hearing from Heiji, the first person he directly admitted to that he slept around, that he doesn't know what he's talking about, thus hurts all the more.

Then it strikes Hattori.

As he faces the Londoner, he realises how utterly shitty Hakuba looks: Guilt-ridden, bone-tired, and above all, absolutely miserable.

If Heiji previously wanted to lash out at him, now all of the anger that had been boiling inside of him before seeps out of his body at that very instant. His own face looks torn with anguish at the thought of what Hakuba might have endured.

The otherwise suave and self-assured detective stands before him like an open book, and it's painfully obvious that he hasn't been sleeping. Who knows, perhaps he hasn't taken care of himself at all, which reminds him of the misery he experienced after his break-up with Kazuha, but also the suffering of the most recent days all the more.

“Ya look like shit fer lack of a better term. . . Ya really should take better care of yerself.”

A small and hollow laugh escapes the Londoner detective before he can stop it, clearly remembering the countless times he ended up becoming a stranger in his own body as the panic took over him. Those past few days were anything but pretty.

“You don't exactly seem to be too well either.”

Sighing in defeat, Heiji puts his hands in his denim jacket's pockets. This time, he sounds a lot less hostile. “I'm confused, Hakuba. Why  _ did  _ ya come here?”

The Londoner cannot hide his hurt and disappointment when the other reverts back to using his last name. He himself called him Hattori-kun last time they met as well, after all, so he really shouldn't expect too much. Why does it pain him to such an extent, however?

“Something was telling me that I should be here today, and lo and behold, that feeling stood corrected! Because apparently I'm keeping you from doing absolutely asinine things. I'm not letting you get taken advantage of  _ twice _ ,  _ Hei-  _ Hattori-kun! Especially not if you are to act foolish in reaction to something  _ I _ have done. I couldn't live with myself if I knew you were to become like me!”

“It had nothing ta do with ya, idiot! I was just- I felt lonely and I came here ta forget about everythin’, at least fer a while, and certainly not with the intention of flirting with anyone else.”

Subconsciously, Saguru takes a step back, deeply affected by how Hattori could so simply state that this had nothing to do with him. It doesn't take a detective to know that Hakuba is directly involved in this, that Heiji had felt a lot better up until their last meeting and never would have gotten into trouble like this if it weren't for the Londoner's words and actions.

“You're. . . right. Who you get involved with has nothing to do with me.” He takes a deep breath. “Yet, it still worries me to see you like this.”

“I don't wanna make ya worry about me. But nobody took advantage of me! Nothin’ even happened back there. Please, calm down.”

Hattori is about to ask him what exactly he meant when he said  _ ‘twice’ _ , only vaguely comprehending that Hakuba was indeed talking about himself alongside Hikage. However, the tumultuous feelings he deals with presently are enough to keep his mind completely occupied.

“He gave you bedroom eyes and attempted to get to your crotch! What do you think would have happened next? Beanie boy probably thought he hit the jackpot with you and would have tried to take you outside to have a nice night with you. Why do you have to be so foolishly kind to a fault? First you're suspicious, and then you just open up and let yourself get taken advantage of! I was planning to give you your space, you know. I was going to apologise to Kudō Shinichi-kun and then stay out of your life so you wouldn't have to see my face anymore. But I kept having this weird feeling that something was wrong, that I  _ needed _ to be here, only to find out that you're about to get lured away by some guy in a bar!”

Heiji pushes his anger aside, swallowing it down alongside his pride, and steps up to Saguru in one sweeping movement. He forcibly pushes him against the bathroom door, fisting his beige-red sweater, placing a reasonably surprised expression on Saguru’s face.

Then, without a warning, the Osakan buries his nose into the fabric and  _ smells  _ him, deeply and unabashedly. His actions were rash and non-ambiguous, he knows that Hakuba must realise what he's doing, but he just doesn't care right now.

Saguru's scent is soothing, enticing, and sweet-smelling all at once, and Heiji isn't subtle about that whatsoever. A deep red blush appears on his cheeks, yet luckily enough, Hakuba cannot see it with his face currently buried in his pullover.

“I  _ really _ missed ya.” Heiji’s voice is shaky, as is his body. More specifically, his legs are, which is why he pushes himself into Saguru to recover stability.

“I've heard enough, you've got it all wrong. I don't want ya ta leave. Don't decide these things on yer own.”

“You. . .  _ missed _ me?” Without a second thought, Saguru gently touches Hattori's face, lifts it up and forces the other to look at him, look into his unbelieving eyes.

“Could you. . . say that again?”

Heiji starts panicking internally, immediately wanting to avert his gaze, hide the emotions that his facial expression saliently exposes once you'd get a good look. But the other detective's eyes are already firmly trained on his own, almost making him lose his mind with the powerful feeling of intimacy.

“Of course I missed ya! I missed ya this whole time we've spent apart. I missed ya the instant I walked away from ya, damn it!”

His heartbeat had quickened with his words and his hands quiver a little, but he doesn't let go of Hakuba's sweater just yet. The flustered detective doesn't know what else to say, despite the fact that one merciless thought after another races through his mind. Being in this vulnerable position, he simply keeps talking, hoping it will calm his nerves somehow.

“As a matter of fact, I came here in the hopes of meetin’ ya again. Though I didn't think ya'd actually be here.”

Saguru's eyes widen, then soften. Heiji  _ missed  _ him. Not just simply missed him, no, apparently, he missed him the entire time. All of his worries about having lost him, about having ruined whatever they had, were for nothing, and he never felt better about being wrong.

Hakuba was never more glad to have worried over nothing. Of course there was still a lot he wanted to do to make up for what he had done - especially when it comes to somehow regaining Kuroba's trust and Kudō's forgiveness - but knowing that he didn't miss the one he had fallen for, even if the other didn't feel the same, is more than relieving.

Even if Hattori only sees him as a friend with benefits, even if the other detective was going to find another, proper partner someday, just knowing that he didn't lose him is enough.

Squeezing his eyes shut, Heiji inhales deeply once, trying to keep any remainders of his self-composure intact. Apparently, the most effective way to do that, according to Hattori's hot temper, is simply kissing the blond unannounced.

And simple it is. It feels like the easiest thing, promptly washing away all previous thoughts. More kisses follow close upon the last, one more passionately than the other.

The Londoner detective gasps, slowly opens his mouth, allowing Hattori to deepen their kiss. Saguru's lips are warm and soft, much like his eyes. They part slightly, allowing Heiji's tongue to slip inside, making him open his own mouth with a low moan. 

For just a moment, a pang of guilt flashes through Hakuba, making him remember what he'd done to Kudō, but there is no time for self-hatred when an incredibly handsome Osakan is standing right in front of you and seemingly wants you.

Reluctantly, and with a somewhat shaking hand, Hakuba pulls Heiji closer, closer, so much closer. He didn't notice that he had been shaking. He doesn't fully know what is happening, either. All he knows is that Hattori Heiji is still in his life.

Hattori’s hand finds its way into the other young man’s golden hair as a means of trying to anchor himself, to hold him there so he won't get lost again.

The more Heiji touches him, the less weight remains on his chest. For the past few days, he dreaded waking up in the morning, dreaded his never-ending pretence of being okay in front of his household. Only now, in the arms of Hattori Heiji, Detective of the West, and Osaka's number one charming face - at the very least to him - does he feel okay.

At that precise moment, nothing else exists outside their little bubble of safety, there is only the exchange of loving touches and little noises that can be heard then and now. Warmth consumes him, and just as he thinks he doesn't want it to ever end, someone tries to enter the bathroom.

They stop straight away, startled by the almost-intrusion. Fortunately for them, the person couldn't get in with Hakuba pressed flush against the door. With swollen lips and hazy eyes, Heiji looks at Hakuba, seemingly not having arrived in this plane of existence yet, so Saguru clears his throat.

“It's occupied!” He shouts, head turned towards the door and away from Heiji's face.

Both of his hands are covering the other's ears, just in case, as he doesn't want to cause him any harm by screaming in his ears. With Hakuba's voice reverberating through the small room, Heiji abruptly snaps back into reality when the situation at hand comes to the fore again.

Saguru remains like that for a little while, trying to see if the person who wanted to enter would try again. He's certain the culprit hasn't left yet, but at the very least they didn't try a second time to enter the door. Slowly, he removes his hands from Hattori's ears, a little sigh escaping him.

“As charming as this bathroom may be, I don't believe we can stay here.”

Heiji promptly lets go of the disheveled beauty, Saguru's new hairstyle assuredly being Hattori's fault, and steps back to make room.

“It is no longer occupied.” The Londoner unnecessarily informs the confused bypasser as they hurriedly leave the bathroom, refusing to make eye contact. Hattori then takes him outside, mumbles something about following him, and takes Saguru down rather familiar roads.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, comments and kudos would be really appreciated. (＾• ω •＾)
> 
> Again, please credit us if we inspired you.


	2. Chapter 2

Once they set foot in the Kansai detective's second home, Heiji has already pressed the blond against another door. He had not even caught a glimpse of his face, so instantaneous and urgent was that tongue that makes its way into Saguru's mouth, flicking it over the Londoner's bottom lip once to beg for entrance.

Saguru is already about to let the other's tongue slide in, opening his mouth willingly, when the other abruptly pulls away, his voice of reason piping up. For a moment, panic swells up inside of Hakuba.

Does Heiji have second thoughts? Is he about to tell him he doesn't want this after all, that they should stop? What he hears, in the end, is completely different from all of that, however.

Breathlessly, Heiji tries to make eye contact, a distinct gleam of concern shining in his eyes. “I just want ta make sure. . . This is what ya want as well, right?”

“What?” Saguru asks eloquently. Then, after a short pause in which he collects his thoughts: “I want this. That's- that's the first time anyone has ever asked me that. Do  _ you _ really want this?”

Heiji pauses to think, completely astounded. If the spiky-haired detective remembers correctly, Saguru told him of various sexual relations he had in the past. How is it possible, then, that he was never once asked for his consent?

Disconcerted, Heiji feels furious at the people the British gent had previously been sleeping with. He doesn't know if it's his place to say anything about it, but then again, he certainly would not be Heiji if he didn't.

“How come no one ever asked ya that?”

“I suppose it was never the right time. Or they simply did not think to ask that.” Hakuba responds, averting his gaze. In truth, he is fully aware that they did not care to ask him that, merely chasing after their own pleasure and leaving Saguru to fend for himself. 

The Kansai detective wants to ask about what exactly Hakuba means when he talks about the right ‘right time’. Something inside him is averse to this whole notion and he can definitely tell that Hakuba isn't mentioning everything.

Belatedly, he notices Saguru’s reddened face and the previously asked question, mind already racing. Although the dark-skinned young man himself had initiated the conversation and asked first, he starts blushing along with Saguru.

There is no doubt he wanted to do this, he had missed him tremendously, after all. However, this time, Saguru should be the indisputable center of attention. “Y-yes, I do. Without a doubt.”

With that said, Heiji takes Hakuba's hand and drags him into his bedroom, then gently pushes him down onto his bed with utmost care.

Saguru pulls him down alongside him, leaving the Osakan on top of him. He loves him. While that certainly isn't news to him, the extent of his love is. It is not a mere crush anymore that will simply go away once they stop having intercourse, if Hattori were to leave after, which he now begins to doubt. No, the feelings he has for Hattori are deeper, and Hakuba thinks they may never fully disappear.

He reaches out for the other boy, hand in his brown hair, and presses their lips together,  _ softly _ , gently, like he’s afraid that one wrong movement could destroy everything.

_ Nobody except Saguru had ever kissed Heiji like this before. _

Delicious warmth is blossoming in Heiji’s whole body, causing him to sigh into the kiss. Hattori couldn't be more glad to have him here, right underneath him, safe and sound. With each second that passes, their kisses are growing more fervent and after a while of increasingly feverish lovemaking, Heiji decides to withdraw himself.

Soon, he kneels in between Saguru's legs and places his hands on the other boy's thighs, a bashful flush already deepening upon his face. “I want ta suck ya off.” 

Saguru gapes at Heiji for a moment that seemingly stretches out indefinitely. 

It is most uncharacteristic of Heiji to completely avoid someone's eyes, but when it comes to matters of a more touchy-feely kind, he certainly isn't very skilfull. Especially not with words, ironically enough.

Slowly, Saguru leans up on his arms, eyes searching for some sign of uncertainty or doubt. “Are you certain?”

Heiji nods once, nervous determination evident on his face. He did all of this before and yet, he still feels very much inexperienced in the presence of Saguru. Trying to repress the trembling of his hands, he shyly tugs at the other's belt to get it open, then makes quick work of the button of his trousers.

For a short-lived moment, the restless detective fumbles around with the zipper, consequently sliding the trousers down to his ankles. One more obstacle to go.

A hand moves across the smooth skin of his lover's stomach, tentative fingers finding their way underneath the waistband, and with one single movement, he pulls the boxer briefs down as well.

Once his dick is in view, Heiji is already tauntingly grinding his palm against Saguru's length, watching it with much anticipation, eyes practically devouring it.

“Ya know I am.”

There’s agitation in his voice, but it also sounds husky and  _ hungry _ , filled with need by simply looking at Hakuba. With that, Heiji grips Hakuba's thigh with his left hand and steadies himself.

Next, he aligns Saguru’s cock with his lips and begins by placing a kiss on the tip. Hopefully, Saguru would not realise right away that he attempts to imitate the other's movements from when the Osakan was on the receiving end.

Without even blinking, Hattori slowly swirls his tongue around the head, gradually swallowing him down. Saguru gasps, his cock twitching due to Heiji’s actions, and a stifled moan escapes him. Heiji is beautiful.

It feels incredibly indecent to be thinking this, considering that the other boy has his hands and lips on Saguru's body, but the Londoner can't help himself.

He wants to tell him, wants to say just how beautiful he thinks the other is, how important, but he  _ can't _ . Not simply because that could ruin everything, bringing in his feelings in a situation where they might not be desired, but also because he has yet to admit that upon further research, Hattori is anything but disappointing.

His initial assessment was  _ wrong _ ,  _ overzealous _ ,  _ biased _ . The Detective of the West wouldn't be the Detective of the West if he weren't capable, after all.

Admitting that he was wrong, however, becomes harder and harder the longer he waits. So he says nothing. Instead, his hand reaches out, gently touches Heiji's cheek, and brushes over it as the other begins devouring him slowly.

Sliding his tongue over the pink flesh before gently sucking it into his mouth, Heiji holds on his partner's hips with both hands to help him sink even deeper. He eases his legs open wider while his lips are wrapped so alluringly and eager around the blond boy's cock.

Soon, he picks up the pace, head bobbing up and down with as much grace as Hattori can muster. Heiji tilts his head back and looks up at him, hand wandering off and lightly tracing Saguru's side, as his palm slides over smooth skin to lull him into a deeper state of bliss.

His face feels like an oven, Hakuba must have noticed when he touched his cheek, although that certainly doesn't mean he thinks giving the Londoner oral is shameful or indecent. No, Heiji finds that he loves seeing Saguru in pleasure. It's a sight that makes his heart swell with pride as he coaxes him to come undone with each slow dip.

With each passing second, the Londoner detective can feel himself growing in size, becoming harder and harder inside of Hattori's mouth. Saguru wants to be quiet, wants to be mindful of the neighbours -  _ what must they be thinking, what with Heiji rarely being at home, yet bringing someone over to have sex with them once he is  _ \- but he isn't quite able to.

He's not loud  _ per se _ , not  _ yet _ , but the little moans escaping him are quite telling of his own pleasure. Despite his partner's inexperience in giving head, he finds the somewhat awkward rhythm and movements to be enjoyable.

No, not just enjoyable, he prefers Hattori's tongue and mouth over anything - besides perhaps having intercourse with Heiji himself - and is melting rather quickly underneath him.

Suddenly, their eyes meet, and Hakuba goes dead silent, mouth dropping open in a little 'o' shape, as the other touches him gently.

_ I love you. I love you, Heiji-kun. Please stay with me. _

His heart is overflowing with emotion, and the Londoner is more than happy that he feels incapable of speech right now. Part of him wonders how the Osakan can so easily swallow him down, heaven knows he had felt taken aback the first time he gave oral, and he  _ likes _ men. He'd be lying if he said that doesn't make him feel special.

The hot-headed detective notices the wet dampening of the fabric of his own underwear. The sensation of Saguru's cock growing harder, however, is enough to hold his attention right where it's needed.

Though the Londoner's face is a distraction as well, and it certainly is worth looking at: He looks immeasurably beautiful like this, having his dick engulfed in wet heat, at the mercy of Heiji's actions.

With this in mind, he groans, which is perfectly accompanied by the other boy's cock twitching and spilling pre-cum, unbeknownst to Saguru himself. Without flinching, Heiji quickly swallows it down while keeping a straight face.

Slick noises fill the room when Hakuba seemingly whispers something, but Hattori has trouble making out what exactly he says. Needless to say, the current physical limitations prevent him from asking, which is why Heiji rakes his nails across vulnerable skin instead, hoping to get a reaction.

Saguru involuntarily lets out a loud moan, hips just barely able to keep from thrusting up and right into Hattori's mouth - albeit he does not stop them completely either. Heiji makes a small, controlled noise for fear of choking on dick tonight as there was no prior warning to this.

Luckily, Saguru’s loss of control occurred when Heiji's mouth wasn't further down, meaning he couldn't cause him any harm through his incapability of keeping still. Heiji even has to chuckle a little when Hakuba's endearing apology reaches his ears.

“‘M sorry,” he mumbles, only to be met with teeth scraping his cock, making his eyes roll back in his head. Truth be told, this is a foreign sensation to him. The men he'd slept with usually had experience, and the few who did decide to take him in their mouth wouldn't have used teeth.

Apparently, the feeling of teeth is supposed to be a no-go, and yet, Hakuba doesn't mind, not with how cautious and deliberate Hattori’s actions seemed. In fact, he very much enjoyed it. 

Suddenly the Osakan has another idea, which is also blatantly copied from their last love-making session. Tentatively, one of his hands wanders off and he promptly finds what he is searching for, fondling Saguru's balls with care, and deliberately kneading them at the cost of his former rhythmic movements.

After a while, Hattori picks up the speed once again while he attempts to breathe through his nose to the best of his ability, ruthlessly bobbing his head up and down with only one goal in mind.

With each passing moment, the Londoner detective becomes louder and louder. Again, he looks at Heiji, eyes pleading for something, anything, most likely release, he belatedly realises.

His hand reaches out again, again seeking the skin on the Osakan's cheek - he doesn't want to lead his head, doesn't want to be greedy, doesn't want the other to lose control to him. If his partner keeps this up, Hakuba feels like he might just come soon.

Without further notice, Heiji impulsively takes the throbbing length out of his mouth, looking straight at Hakuba with a passionate glint in his eyes.

Hakuba whimpers, immediately missing the warmth of those lips wrapped around him. He was so close, he would have come with just a few more bobbing movements.

Just a little bit more, and he would have felt the sweet relief of la petite mort - of course not without warning, as he wouldn't want Heiji to find a nice surprise in the form of Saguru's cum running down his throat.

“I want ya ta come, but not like this.”

Hastily removing his own pants and underwear, he immediately climbs up the bed and on top of the blond detective. Heiji looks at him with a hesitant expression, although he makes up his mind shortly afterwards.

With a newfound urgency, the green-eyed force of nature takes both of their dicks into his hand, jerking them both off, and lewdly moans when he finally feels some friction himself.

“Fuck, Saguru-kun–” Heiji ruts against him, losing his inhibitions at last, as he bites on his lower lip, darkened and wet with saliva.

Saguru's mouth drops wide open at the sight in front of him. He doesn't hold back anymore, lets every sound escape him unabashedly, neighbours be damned.

Just one single thing bothers him still, namely the way Hattori decided to bite his own lip instead of making use of the perfectly available lips right in front of him, so Saguru pulls him down, lets his tongue slide against the other's lip, then opens his own mouth a little, to be bitten, to be kissed, to simply be available for whatever Heiji desires to do with him, as Saguru himself begins to lose his mind even further, sparks hastily taking over.

Heiji doesn't waver, biting back a moan, and instantly presses forward to seize his lips, pillowy against his own. Greedily, he licks Saguru's lower lip, bites on it once, then slips his tongue inside his mouth while thrusting into his own hand.

Hakuba's scent is dizzying, making Heiji crave all of him, now and always, and he hopes from the bottom of his heart that the Londoner feels the same way about him. He loves Saguru and he wants to  _ make _ love to Saguru.

After God knows how many minutes of heatedly devouring each other, Heiji pulls back slightly and gasps for air. Shortly afterwards, Hattori pounces on Hakuba's neck, mewls into the other's ear without actually meaning to, and for a moment, the detective stops thrusting entirely to devote himself to plastering the Briton's neck with as many love bites as he can muster, once again denying Saguru la petite mort.

Saguru's hands roam across Hattori's body, searching for some way to hold on, yet it is in vain, for he cannot possibly hope to come down from the high that is Hattori Heiji. Especially not when his highly esteemed Detective of the West begins to rut against him once more, biting him, almost painfully hard, one last time.

Hakuba comes with a scream.

Later on, he most definitely would feel embarrassed about this little happenstance, but at the moment, all he can think of is the beautiful young man in front of him. White liquid strings cover his stomach, the darker detective's hand, as the rutting continues for a little while longer.

He hardly takes note.

Too far gone, too deep in his orgasmic bliss, too much in love with the Osakan he once mocked.

Heiji's brain short-circuits, his face flushed and hot, only paying attention to the blissed-out Londoner, who is currently in a state of post-orgasmic glory. True, unadulterated bliss looks so good on him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No, we're not gone! Sorry that we didn't update in a month. . .  
> We had the WIPs done for quite a while, I just didn't have the energy to actually complete them. . .  
> Sorry! But at the very least we're back? Yay?
> 
> Also before anyone asks: Yes, they will talk. Later.
> 
> As always, comments and kudos would be really appreciated. (＾• ω •＾)


	3. Chapter 3

Hattori takes advantage of the moment, slithers off the bed, and swiftly takes a small bottle, and a package of condoms, out of the nightstand. Saguru's eyes follow Heiji's every move. Vaguely, he comprehends that Hattori is holding something, though his mind is not quite capable of catching up yet, which is why he doesn't comment on it.

Within seconds, Heiji hovers over the blond detective once again and quickly tosses the lubricant to the side, although still keeping it within reach.

Then, he places various scattered kisses on Hakuba's stomach, causing the Londoner to moan softly with each new one, ignoring his own throbbing length, and leaves a trail of kisses in his wake, his lips soon reaching the blond's nipples.

In a heartbeat, the Osakan takes one into his mouth and tenderly sucks on it, hoping that it would elevate Saguru's state of bliss even further.

All Heiji can think about is how gorgeous the stunning detective in front of him is, moaning so sweetly with each kiss, gasping because of him, but he is stopped soon by a concerned hand that grasps his shoulder. Abruptly, Hattori snaps back into reality and immediately comes to a standstill.

“You didn't come yet.” Just as Saguru finishes uttering those words, his mind catches up, and he sits up a little, glancing at the bottle his partner previously held, before dropping back down again, not quite ready to be doing much else yet.

“I guess I’ll withdraw my previous observation, true as it may be.” He chuckles slightly, fingers playing with Heiji's hair and slowly running down until they reach his cheek, cupping it gently. “Evidently, you are quite prepared for this.”

“Course I am. Since we had sex for the first time, I read up on some stuff. I don't wanna hurt ya, jus' like that first time when ya didn't even use lube, so. . . Yeah, I bought some. I'm really sorry I didn't know better at the time.”

“Would you stop worrying about that? It's fine, it didn't really hurt, and as you have previously mentioned, it's not like you knew anything about this before. If anything, I'm the one to blame here, as I easily could have looked for a replacement lubricant.”

Granted, it is a blatant lie that it didn't hurt, but Saguru has had it with Heiji worrying about this. He's fine. It's been  _ fine _ . It's not Heiji's fault that Saguru didn't get up, didn't want to risk that he may kill the mood or give Hattori second thoughts if he were to have taken his sweet time back then.

But then again, the Londoner didn't say it didn't hurt at all, so it's not like he was completely omitting the truth either. A win for his conscience, he's certain.

Quickly, Heiji continues, suddenly and nonchalantly showing off condoms, and-  _ oh _ . Right.  _ Condoms _ . Would it be strange if he admitted that he likes feeling the Osakan directly? Clearly, Hattori was thinking about this before, perhaps even felt uncomfortable with the thought of not using one, and that just makes Saguru feel a tiny bit guilty there.

“I also got this.” Heiji’s face had been turning red already even before he said anything. Then, there is a short pause before he hesitantly begins to speak.

“Uh, I know we didn't use one of these b-before, but. . . This is still an option, just so ya know. Like I've told ya, I only had sex once before we've met, and I definitely used a condom back then.”

Clearing his throat with embarrassment, Heiji stops there, deciding on waiting for a response rather than babbling like an idiot.

“Technically speaking we did use them. . . just. . . when I entered you.”

_ There is no eloquent way to say this, is there? _

“I likely should have thought much sooner about this, and for that I apologise. I- well.” Saguru sighs deeply, feeling kind of embarrassed himself right now. “For starters, I want, no, need you to know that I am clean, just in case you are worried.” Another pause. “That said, I have never had intercourse with anyone without using a condom.” He looks away. “Until you, that is.”

For just a moment, he lets those words sink in, doesn't really know why as he doesn't intend on elaborating them no matter what, until he looks back at Heiji, visibly swallowing before he speaks up again.

“I understand if you would prefer using one, of course, but rest assured that I do neither intend to have sexual intercourse with anyone besides you in the foreseeable future, nor should I pose any risk to you. Again, I do apologise for not realising this much sooner.”

“Aho, ya don't have ta apologise! It's my fault as well for not having said anythin', especially that second time during the heist. It's not like I don't know how this stuff works in theory, only that I never made any experiences in  _ that _ department!”

Hakuba can't suppress a small chuckle upon hearing Heiji's incapability of uttering the words "gay sex", instead opting to paraphrase it. It's cute. Hattori is cute. Although he's certain that the hot-blooded detective wouldn't like to be called that, which is why Saguru will keep those thoughts to himself. Besides, there are other words to describe him as well, such as handsome and headstrong, which would likely be much preferred by him anyways.

“Which is ta say, I am a little worried, although not about you being clean or not - I trust ya, and I know you're way too meticulous and careful otherwise. . . I was jus' curious why ya weren't keen on using one when I was on top, I suppose. In any case, we're both ta blame here, since we're both consenting adults and all that jazz.”

Once he finishes talking, something clicks in his head.

_ Until you, that is. _

Surely that must mean that Hakuba feels romantic attraction towards the Kansai detective, which is just another puzzle piece that leads to the undeniable truth that Saguru may share his sentimental feelings.

That sentence alone makes his heart beat faster and jump with glee. Hakuba doesn't want any other sexual partner than Hattori Heiji, and this is all the Osakan needs to know to proceed.

Unceremoniously, Heiji tosses the condoms aside, yet again closing the distance between their lips. He kisses Saguru zestfully before the other is even able to get out a word, as if he is trying to wipe that embarrassed look off the taller detective's face.

After a while, the kissing stops, which is immediately replaced by the sensation of biting and pulling on the Londoner's lower lip as Heiji withdraws. Taking the bottle of lubricant into his hand, he opens it with a loud clicking noise and coats two fingers with the scented gel.

Completely ignoring - or rather, being uncharacteristically unaware of what Heiji is doing - Saguru finally opens his mouth again, his brain catching up with what he had previously wanted to say to his partner.

“Initially, I just didn't want you to get turned off, I suppose. After that, I just didn't mind with you. . . but wait, if you're not worried about me being clean, then what are you-”

“This will be cold.” Heiji cuts him off before he can finish, gingerly rubbing his fingers against Saguru's entrance, causing Hakuba to gasp out in surprise.

_ “Heiji-kun!” _ Saguru's eyes are fiery, narrowing as if he were daring Heiji to answer his unfinished question.

With a chortle of glee at Hakuba's loss of composure, Heiji keeps prodding at his entrance. Having the blond detective at his mercy is quite a lot of fun, he realises: Usually, Saguru is the unflappable kind of man, always seeming even-tempered, regardless of the situation. 

Although now he wasn't anything like that, much to Heiji's pleasure, and his enjoyment speaks volumes. He decides to have mercy on him, however.

“Calm down, pretty boy.”

Saguru very nearly pouts. Which would be highly unusual for him, and thus a rather unwelcome reaction to the matters at hand. Lucky for him, he is able to stop his pout from even forming. He doesn't like how Heiji is able to get under his skin.

Sure, Hattori's not the only one capable of teasing him, or even getting him to react a little more heatedly than what is the norm for him, but the Detective of the West is the only one who can make him react quite like this.

The Kansai detective pauses for a moment, appearing to be thinking thoroughly about what he will say next. Without having said anything yet, it's already painfully obvious that Hattori is very nervous about what he will indubitably say next.

“It's just, I wouldn't wanna come inside ya if it's unwelcome. . . or in case ya think it's distasteful.”

Deeming it inappropriate, Heiji's movements stop completely for one moment, embarrassed to have revealed such an inappropriate side of himself. Hesitatingly, he makes eye contact again, hoping for affirmation on the part of his lover.

“It's the opposite.” Saguru's eyes seem sharp and penetrating, making it nearly impossible to look away. “If it's you, I don't mind. In fact, I want to be filled by your cum, Hattori Heiji-kun.”

Heiji's breath gets caught, not having anticipated the brutal honesty, which, needless to say, is a huge turn-on for the Kansai boy. He should have known the Londoner is outspoken like this, not one to mince words, since he basically is the epitome of precision and truthfulness. 

The catchphrase he had chosen as a mantra for his detective work reflects his general approach to things perfectly, though Heiji loves to coax out other, yet unseen sides of the otherwise minutely detailed and unruffled detective - quite like that adorable almost-pout on his face.

Hattori's eyes, however, are unreadable in the dim light of the room and the Osakan plans to use that to his advantage. Saguru is just about to suggest he would prepare himself for Heiji, seeing how the other might be feeling a little awkward with this still, not having had much experience with preparing someone thus far and all that, when something unforeseen happens.

Promptly, Heiji pulls his fingers back, then looks at Saguru with an ingenious glint in his eyes. “Would ya do me the favour and lie on yer stomach?”

Turning around, that he could do. It makes a lot of sense, too, doing it from behind. It is a far better position to be having sex in without running the risk of hurting the other, albeit it does come with the drawback of not being able to see the other's face.

Unfortunately, Hattori Heiji has a very  _ handsome  _ face, and thus not being able to see it would be a huge shame, though not one he couldn't live with.

“Of course.” Almost like a silken sheet, Hakuba slides away from underneath Hattori, reappearing mere seconds later turned around, marble skin there to be touched and right within the Kansai boy's grasp.

It doesn't take long until Heiji continues his advances and grabs a fistful of his ass, which is, incidentally, very easy on the eyes. Tentatively, he kneads Hakuba's cheeks first, and then starts to spread his cheeks apart a little to gain better access.

Soon enough, something wet licks at the puckered flesh, teasing him with a certain precision yet an evident inexperience. Immediately, the blond gasps out, completely stupefied by Heiji's change of action, though he doesn't say something  _ yet _ .

Heiji takes his time and presses a few gentle kisses against the rim, which are accompanied by the occasional flick of his tongue every so often. The more time passes, however, the more Heiji's confidence grows and with that, he licks long, wet stripes from Saguru's taint to the top of his rear.

The ambitious Osakan dearly hopes that his lover would find it enjoyable, despite the fact that he has hardly any idea about what he is doing and if he is doing it properly.

Saguru begins to feel his cheeks warming up a little. What is Hattori thinking back there? Where did he even get that idea from!? Trying his best to look at the other from his position, and not to let any moan escape him as he's preparing to talk, he opens and closes his mouth a few times. Then-

“Don't you. . . doesn't that disgust you?”

Not that it disgusts the Londoner detective himself, of course not, but he certainly didn't expect Heiji to do this. And even if he  _ had _ , he wouldn't have expected it now, of all times. Once again, Hattori Heiji is an enigma to him.

“No! I- I've read about this before. Just. . . tell me when something feels weird. Or good.”

And with that, Heiji spreads Hakuba's plump cheeks, burying his nails into the soft flesh. His tongue readily brushes against the sensitive entrance again already, swirling around the opening with eagerness.

At first, he makes quick and forceful laps at the delicate region, and shortly after begins to thrust his tongue in and out. His arousal addled brain is completely on autopilot, mimicking what he had seen and read about in the private of his home, and he hopes it will make his blond lover melt into a puddle of bliss sooner or later.

Heiji definitely has done his research about homosexual practices since he met Saguru. However, the true challenge is to transfer his entirely theoretical know-how into practice.

Naturally, Saguru doesn't avert his sultry gaze and keeps on looking at Heiji. It makes him feel slightly self-conscious about this whole ordeal for a second, although he doesn't falter with his efforts, not in the slightest.

Fervently, he keeps tonguing into his lover's hole, only stopping to flutter his tongue against the rim once in a while.

“I like this.” He moans out, not holding back to reassure his bedmate that he's doing well as he thrusts his tongue in and out. The hot-blooded Osakan can't help himself when he shivers, the Londoner's soft-spoken praise easily getting to him.

“The circles, too. They felt amazing.” Saguru keeps on moaning for a moment, focusing on the sensations the Osakan is providing him with. “You're doing amazing, dear.”

Heiji’s brain all but short-circuits, making him elicit a sensual groan for no other reason than Saguru calling him his  _ dear _ . Stupefied, the Kansai detective pulls back, watching him closely for one brief moment.

A new wave of arousal comes down Saguru’s spine, making him yearn for Hattori even more than he had before. Which doesn't mean much, considering how he, at this point, always yearns for him, readily being available for however many rounds Hattori was willing to give him.

Yet, in his current state of just having come, it still means that he went from being blissfully screwed and open for more to actively wanting to be filled by the Osaka detective.

With an unreadable expression, Heiji hurriedly searches for the lubricant, popping open the cap with his thumb, then swirling it around to coat his fingers with the slick liquid.

In a matter of seconds, his index finger rubs against Saguru's entrance yet again, covering it with a generous amount of lube that allows Heiji to push into him with ease.

_ Oh my _ .

“You're getting quite skilled at this.”

Tingles roll down his spine when Hakuba compliments him again, his finger already sliding in and out at an increasing pace. Saguru is so unbelievably beautiful, even from this angle, and all Heiji wants is to touch him and keep touching him.

Letting out a quiet moan, he bends down a little to place fleeting kisses on Saguru's skin right above his backside, alternating between watching his finger move into him smoothly and glancing up to gauge his lover's reactions.

Saguru's skin is covered in goosebumps out of reaction to Heiji's kisses and touches, while he himself lets out little mewls, refusing to hold back, partly for his partner's sake. Whenever their eyes meet, he feels a certain warmth in his chest, the care the other young man shows him melting him into a figurative puddle.

Soon, Heiji adds a second finger while his hand glides over the high school detective's lower back. “Do ya want me ta be rougher?”

Hakuba is so focused on his love towards Hattori Heiji that he nearly misses the question, mouth falling open a little as soon as he realises what he's been asked. Part of him wants to say  _ no _ , wants to enjoy the sweetness of this moment, but he would also be partly lying to himself.

He  _ likes it _ when Heiji is rough with him. Practically got off on it initially. So no, no matter how much he loves being taken care of, acting like a pillow princess in front of the less experienced detective, it's not what he  _ prefers _ per se.

“Wreck me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, comments and kudos would be really appreciated. (＾• ω •＾)
> 
> Seriously, please comment, it's my main source of serotonin. . . (╥﹏╥)


	4. Chapter 4

Heiji wastes no time pondering over this and spreads Hakuba's knees apart, momentarily pulling the fingers out to change positions, causing Saguru to hiss.  _ Too fast _ . Seconds later, Heiji swings his leg over Hakuba's, now straddling his thigh, and squeezes more lube onto his fingers.

Bit by bit, he presses the first finger into Saguru again, and then a second. Hattori stops for a brief moment to let him adjust to the sensation while one hand smoothes over the well-formed curve of his ass.

Shortly after, the Osakan starts scissoring inside him, the wet noises that the movements create sounding so obscene in his ears, and quickly adds a third finger as soon as practicable, teasing him relentlessly.

Hakuba turns his head away, face half buried in Hattori's pillow, a low moan coming from his lips. Unexpectedly, Hattori starts hitting his prostate then, causing Saguru's body to spasm for a moment, delightful noises escaping him as his eyes roll back.

It would be an outright lie if Heiji said that he did it on purpose, but since he is devoting a great deal of effort and attention to Hakuba's sexual pleasure, Hattori is still proud for making him moan like that.

By now, his lover is soaking wet with lube beneath him, he actually sounds close to  _ wrecked _ , which is why Heiji doesn't let him wait any longer than he has to. Heiji makes quick work of his own trousers and underwear, abandoning both beside his bed.

With the next step in mind, he feels the arousing heat pulsing in his abdominal region and the unrelenting beat of his heart pounding, although it doesn't keep him from hastily pouring lube over his own cock and stroking his half-hard dick to life straightaway.

It doesn't take long for Heiji to dribble precome at the sudden attention as he tries his best to bite back moans for the simple reason that is called pride and perhaps for his neighbours' sake.

Then, he gets down on his knees between Hakuba's legs, swallowing hard at the most enticing sight. With a newly awakened sense of overwhelming urgency, the Kansai detective lines himself up and pushes into his partner, letting out a lustful moan at the tight sensation surrounding him.

Hakuba’s mouth hangs open, and in the heat of the moment, the words "I love" escape him, muffled in the pillow, yet still audible enough. Quickly, he ends them by saying "this" and "please keep going" and "don't stop".

Once Heiji has about a third inside of him, the dark-skinned high schooler leans over him to huskily whisper in his ear.

“Ya love this, huh?”

As a matter of fact, he isn't sure if that is what the half-Brit wanted to say, since he had hesitated for split second, but there is no time for their playful banter - Saguru doesn't want him to stop, wants him to keep going, to wreck him right here, right now.

For a fleeting moment, his finger tips float over the Londoner's back, gently skimming the warm and smooth skin, until seconds later and without any prior warning, his nails dig into his flesh, scratching all the way down to his waistline.

Saguru's entire body shivers in response. This, as well as hearing Heiji repeat his own words back at him, feels intimate, yet a little teasing as well.

When he hears Heiji moan out again, Hakuba rocks his hips back into him, and the other boy almost topples over then, letting out a heated, guttural moan, which would be quite embarrassing if it weren't for the horny stupor they're in.

“If I am not mistaken, you seem to love this quite a bit as well, no?”

Hakuba's hips roll into Heiji again and again, and it looks so sinful that it makes him groan each time the detective's backside impinges on his abdomen. The Osakan can practically hear the smirk on the blond's lips with each carefully selected word, it almost drives him to insanity.

He digs his fingers into Saguru's hips, gripping him firmly, and doesn't waste any more time, slamming into him all at once, practically causing Hakuba to scream and slide forwards on the bedsheets by the sheer force of it.. His pace is slow and forgiving at first, but gradually increasing in speed. Hakuba wants Heiji to be rough with him, so rough he would be.

The Osakan feels hazy with want, needs to drive more of these intoxicating noises out of his lover and make him completely forget about the last few days, their argument, the encounter at the bar, everything. With each sharp thrust of his hips, Heiji moans with pleasure, no longer capable of holding himself back.

Hakuba grabs the sheets, not merely to keep his body from escaping the thrusts his partner is administrating, but also to have something to hold on. The quicker the thrusts get, the more Saguru realises he needs a different kind of hold, and one of his hands lets go, grabbing the Osakan instead, clinging to him tightly.

A thought crosses his mind then, one he previously wouldn't even have dared to voice, but in the heat of the moment, he feels safe, feels like he could ask for anything, and Heiji may just indulge him if he's lucky.

“Spank me, Heiji-kun, just- spank me.”

Heiji’s movement suddenly comes to a complete standstill upon hearing what the normally well-mannered detective utters, no, demands of him. Did Hakuba, polite and courteous Hakuba Saguru, just order the Osaka detective to spank him? Sure, it wasn’t the first time he had shown him a different side of himself, and yet. 

Today has been taking one interesting turn after another, although he would've never expected to hear these words from the Londoner himself. Something like this must surely happen once in a lifetime only.

As unlikely as it is, he doesn't let Hakuba ask for it twice, his hand already flying through the air, and before he knows, his hand goes down at full pace, smacking Saguru's butt cheek with a loud, slightly reverberating noise.

Heiji has no idea what he is doing, if this is what he wanted, but he hopes that this is as pleasing as what the other had imagined, eagerly wanting to satisfy his lover's every sexual urge. Another wave of arousal shoots through the Osakan as he smacks the flesh a second time, followed up by possessively digging his nails into the pale skin.

“Good boy.”

Truthfully, Saguru is not entirely asking for this due to the actual pleasure it provides him with, but also secretly viewing it as a little punishment for his misbehaviour from before, albeit the Detective of the West had no need to know this.

Especially since he  _ does _ enjoy a little impact play, and if Heiji knew about the reason why he was able to ask for it now, he might be less inclined to give him what he wants. And being an only child from a rich family, Hakuba does  _ want  _ quite a bit.

Although nowadays, that would be mostly Hattori Heiji, if truth be told, and anything he is willing to give.

To Heiji, it is absolutely beautiful to witness this breathtaking scene in front of him, Hakuba throwing his head back upon impact, feeling the other boy clench around him - it feels  _ too _ good.

Heiji lets out a low moan at the sensation, feeling utterly ecstatic when Saguru sinks down on him a little more, and his brain completely shuts down upon hearing the blond detective praise him again, hand reaching out to pull on the blond’s hair, needing to satisfy Saguru’s desire to be wrecked.

His flattering words are on repeat in his mind, ricocheting from one metaphorical wall to the next; He can't possibly get enough. It makes his whole body shudder with pleasure and Heiji can't even attempt to hide it.

“Saguru,” he murmurs, most eloquently, his voice sounding like the Kansai detective is on cloud nine instead of his bedroom. As a result of Hakuba's encouragement, he spanks him yet another time, zestfully and without mercy. 

Inwardly, Hakuba hopes that Heiji will soon be able to see the red imprint of his own hand red on the pale skin of Saguru, making the Osakan acutely aware of yet another way in which he's marked him. He barely has the time to muse over this, as soon enough Hattori starts thrusting into him again, leaving only two thoughts on the Londoner detective's mind.

One: A repeated string of  _ I love you _ . Over, and over again, overflowing and yet kept close to his chest, hidden.

Two: He absolutely, without the shadow of a doubt, needs to make Hattori release soon. His poor love hasn't had the chance to yet, stopped for Saguru's own sake, and it just wouldn't do.

“I want you to come for me, my dear.” He pauses to breathe. “Can you do that for me?”

Heiji holds his breath and keeps his lips tightly closed so that no sound could escape while his face feels indescribably hot, furious blush creeping onto his face when Hakuba utters the words  _ my dear _ , and he is endlessly grateful that the blond can't see him like this due to the position they are in.

The question feels so incredibly intimate and foolishly simple, but it certainly is doubly effective and has him drowning in pleasure - just hearing him like this, voice all silky and sultry, is too much and Heiji swears he could have blown his load right then and there.

Within seconds, he bends down as he tries to navigate his body and keep his balance, which is doubtlessly more difficult than he anticipated. Once he has somewhat awkwardly wriggled himself into position, his upper body is pressed flush against Saguru's back, whereas his lips are directly beside Hakuba's head, unintentionally breathing hot air against his sensitive outer ear.

He can only barely restrain himself, hips relentlessly pounding into his irresistible lover without the need for rhythm. The Osakan abandons his rational mind and doesn't hold back any longer, one sinful moan after another leaving his lips, and it doesn't matter how loud he is when he is so dangerously close to relief and feeling hazy with lust, with love, desperate to hold onto Saguru and feel even more of him.

Trying to get a grasp, his hands slide across his warm chest, brush against his nipples, and he pinches them teasingly, just for the heck of it. With each frantic thrust, the dark-skinned detective chases his own orgasm, digs his fingers into Saguru's chest to steady himself, and before long, his orgasm ripples through him mercilessly, making him shudder all over as he cries out Saguru's name over and over.

Quickly and without thinking, Hattori bites into the other's shoulder to silence himself before his vision fades to black. Time seems to slow down as his body is going still, and he finds that he can't hold himself up with his body being completely limp now.

His cock pulses deep inside of the Londoner, still releasing hot strings of cum inside, and this easily is among the most satisfying moments of his life. He loves Hakuba Saguru and would do anything to keep him here, staying as close to his heavenly warmth as possible.

They both end up being pressed flush against the bed, flush against each other, sticking together through sweat and sex.

“You are marvellous, sugarplum, absolutely brilliant. You've done so well.” Saguru coos as he does his best to lift his hand and pet through Heiji's hair from this position.

Anything more than that, and he would actually confess to him right then and there, telling him that he wants to be more than just friends with benefits, that he would like the other to be his. 

It feels absolutely divine to lie there like nothing wrong had ever happened, careless and without doubts about the events of the past few days, even though the angle of the blond's hand is a rather awkward one. It doesn't matter. Heiji simply wants this peaceful moment to go on and on, Saguru spoiling him with gentle touches, with nothing and nobody in between them.

Heiji knows that they had to talk to Kudō before that could happen, because the Detective of the East undoubtedly deserves an apology and a detailed explanation about the situation that unfolded between Saguru and him, although that is an issue they would tackle another day.

After what feels like an eternity, Heiji pulls out of his lover, rolls onto his side and stretches himself languidly, breathing out with contentment, before the muscle fatigue sets in. Hakuba winces a little, somehow not having expected the other to leave his body in spite of the fact that he eventually would have to do so.

A small smile forms on his lips as he looks at the blissed out puddle that is Hattori Heiji, and he instinctively reaches out to push a few stray hairs out of the other's face.

“I hope ya don't mind if I'm bein’ talkative after sex, but I need ta say what's been on my mind.” Saguru nods once, smile faltering, as he listens to what Heiji has to say next.

“So, thank ya for lookin’ after me back at the bar. I wasn't in my right mind after I've left a few days ago and I guess I really just wanted ta fill the void I felt after that, hence why I didn't notice that  _ beanie boy _ might've had different things in mind when he started talkin’ ta me. I appreciate that ya intervened when I needed it the most, unknown to myself at the time.”

Hattori pauses and appears to be deep in thought for a brief moment before he continues once again, sounding a little softer than before.

“Listen, I've had lots of time ta think and I'm not mad at ya, not anymore. Ya didn't make any excuses and were honest with me when ya confessed about kissin’ Kudō, even if the timing could've been a better one. Jealousy is a bitch of an emotion that warps yer mind if you're not careful, and it's not like I didn't have my fair share of experiences with that as well.”

The Kansai detective’s eyes perfectly display the vulnerability that became entrenched in his heart in recent days, caused by all the doubts and wistfulness that had seeped and eventually eaten into him, while searching for Saguru's brown ones.

“I don't think lesser of you, Saguru, and ya certainly aren't as bad as that Harada guy. Nothin’ that has happened between us was the result of some bad karma voodoo that had been comin’ for ya. What I'm trying ta say here is that I want ta hear the whole story and that I won't judge ya for anything ya've done.”

For a short moment, the Guest from Abroad keeps eye contact with Hattori, but soon enough, he realises it is too much, makes him feel too open and vulnerable, so he takes a deep breath and closes his eyes instead.

“I do owe you an explanation, don't I? Don't worry, it's a rhetorical question. Then, let me preface this by saying that I have not had the best luck in matters love thus far.” He opens his eyes, looking directly into Heiji's own once more.

“Several times, I had assumed someone else to share my feelings for them, only to find out that this was not exactly the case. Eventually, I would transfer to Ekoda, and lo and behold, meet three individuals that intrigued and continue to intrigue me. They are my closest friends to date, and you may think me strange for having had feelings for all of them at some point, but it simply was the case.”

_ Was _ the case. He sincerely hopes Hattori doesn't pick up on that particular choice of words. Yet, it is the truth; whatever feelings had remained for his group, they are strictly of platonic nature now, all but forgotten now with a new presence in his life.

“Kuroba doesn't like me very much. Or rather, he doesn't like showing that he enjoys my company, calling me a bastard, for example. Which would have been fine, really, if it weren't for one little detail. At some point, he started talking about Kudō Shinichi. Mainly in passing, off-hand comments here and there, but having those be accompanied by him looking up your best friend's cases? It always left a bitter taste in my mouth.”

Finally, he averts his gaze, unable to look at the person he has fallen in love with, and somewhat betrayed, any longer.

“I felt like because I knew him first, I had a right to be the one closest to him, or at the very least closer than a detective that just recently returned from his absence in the spotlight.” 

Heiji can clearly see the deeply rooted doubts that eat their way through the guilt-ridden Londoner on his face, judging from the sudden change of expression, and the fact that he cannot seem to relax around him when they do anything else than making love.

Immediately, Hattori spurs into action and reaches out, taking the other's hand into his own - seeing him struggle like this is something the Osakan cannot bear, he realises, especially now that they both suffered through the time they've spent apart from each other, both equally miserable.

“I wanted to meet Kudō Shinichi-kun with my own eyes, I suppose. It is not like I had planned to- I did not come to him with the intention of assaulting him. In truth, I merely wanted to talk and see what kind of person he is.”

The Kansai detective listens with great attention, his eyes not once leaving the taller detective while he pours his heart out, and it still bothers him immensely how the other almost bashfully averted his gaze.

Disliking the distance it created between them, he waits for Hakuba to finish speaking only to grasp his chin and tilt it sideways, effectively forcing him to face Heiji again.

“I don't like that look on yer face one bit.” For a short-lived moment, Heiji simply looks at him with a reassuring smile, then starts speaking again with a low voice.

“I get it. I've fallen in love before, once or twice. . . ya might guess who I had a crush on, so I won't drop any names. Needless ta say, one of two times, the feeling was entirely unrequited. And it hurt.  _ A lot _ . It doesn't come as a surprise that, sometimes, we do irrational things that we wouldn't have done under any other circumstance. Because nothin’ defines humans better than their willingness ta do absolutely stupid things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. Nobody's immune ta irrationality and makin’ mistakes. But ya felt ashamed and sorry for what ya did to Kudō! Above all, ya wanna offer him a heart-felt apology. So please get off yer own case for a moment.”

He grins. “Oh, and ya better not tell me the names of any evil exes.”

“That shouldn't be an issue, considering that there are no evil exes in the first place.” Saguru chuckles genuinely, despite the implications his words have.

Heiji looks at him with a gaze that he would probably call a bit too openly affectionate, but fortunately, the Osakan can't possibly observe himself. Teal eyes are sticking to Saguru's lips, or alternatively, his astonishingly pretty eyes, and the way the blond chuckles is absolutely breathtaking and pleasing to the ear. . .  _ Focus, Heiji. _

“Which reminds me, I did tell you that I am no longer involved with anyone besides you, did I not? So you can rest assured that there will not be any further happenstances like the one from a few days ago - even if I had, technically speaking, not been involved with him.”

Saguru hesitates for a short moment. “I would like to thank you, by the way. I do believe this had not been the first time you stood up for me, and given that you did not exactly like me the first time, I am all the more grateful for what you've done.”

“If ya say that, then I believe ya. Although I'm not completely convinced yet, either, especially if ya take the lousy personality of that moron Harada into account. Nobody has the right ta treat ya like that. That's what I told ya at Ellery Queen's a while back when he– when that asshole tried to lay his hands on ya.”

Talking about the incident at the bar awakens the slumbering fury he had felt before, and for a split second, Heiji's voice has a somber ring to it, but he soon sits up, one hand coming up to softly ruffle through Hakuba's hair as though nothing has happened.

“Yeah, ya told me all that before and I know I shouldn't pry. It's just that ever since the unfortunate reunion that day, I've been really worried about ya. . .”

And with that, it quickly becomes apparent that the Kansai detective once again seeks the incomparable closeness and warmth of the other boy, subtly trying to scoot over to him - he knows too well that Londoner's razor-sharp mind misses next to nothing at any time, so he doesn't even have to pretend to be smooth here.

Heiji had never been particularly good at being subtle and hiding his unruly nature, anyway, but clearly, Saguru didn't mind his boisterous charm one bit.

Wordlessly, he guides the Half-Brit to turn around, after which he pulls him as close to himself as possible. Hattori is glad that this intimate position hides the growing flush on his face, and he is well aware that it's more than painfully ironic, given that they had sex just a few moments ago.

Saguru sits up a little more, then gently puts one hand on Heiji's arm, petting him softly, as his head leans against Hattori's chest, hearing and feeling him breathe.

For a moment, there is nothing but silence between them - not the uncomfortable kind, but rather a welcome one that promises safety. A huge weight has been lifted off of the Londoner's chest, after all, and most of all, he doesn't have to worry about losing Heiji, at least not for now.

Finally, he decides to break the silence once more, licking his lips before he speaks up.

“I don't mind. . . talking about things with you, that is. Albeit there truly is no need to feel worried about me, I am okay.”

Without even thinking, he turns his head, temporarily sitting up a little straighter, and oh-so delicately kisses Heiji's lips. Seconds later, he has to wonder if they have done this before - kissing, outside of sex, almost like a couple, and he quickly turns his head away, feeling a blush creep up his neck. He really shouldn't get too ahead of himself.

“I won't let anything like that happen again, I promise.”

This is the exact moment Heiji never knew he had been genuinely yearning for, only realising the truth when Hakuba is so close to him, and it becomes especially clear to him that he can no longer leave him alone, must protect him, no matter how.

Against all odds, Hakuba Saguru has become the person he actually cares for the most, and he's more than happy to be here with him.. Heiji can hardly believe his own luck. Having Saguru nestled against his chest makes Hattori's heart melt slowly.

It also makes him a little nervous due to the sudden intimate position, amusingly so, even though he had been the one to initiate it in the first place. Hakuba must be hearing how fast his heart beats for him, barely breathing due to the intensity of being entangled with the blond detective.

It isn't awkward, however, and he enjoys their silence, doesn't feel like doing anything else than spending time with Saguru, simply existing alongside his enemy-turned-lover. Heiji is feeling like a cloud of joyful satisfaction surrounds him as he holds onto Hakuba, arms tightly slung around his upper body.

“And I won't let anything happen to you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Exciting news!!  
> "You Look Better When I'm Drunk" now has art!!  
> Please do check it out! (*´▽`*)
> 
> As for what comes next. . . well, there are a few things that ought to be talked about, no?  
> So stay tuned for that! Perhaps we'll finally get to catch up with our current season as well?  
> Considering that our boys are still very much stuck in December. . . while we're in June. Oh geez.
> 
> As always, we'd very much enjoy receiving kudos and comments! (*≧ω≦*)


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